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Uterus Quest Part 13: The Fifth Element

par FuckMan
8/10 82 pts / 10 votes - 8 commentaires
Hi! I'm Quess, I think I like you! LOL!

WHO are you? And what have you done to Clara? Where is she? And what is all this blood on the floor?

King tut tut tut! So many questions F*ck'dman, but forget Clarice. Introductions are needed first.

I am the mystery of the mysteries, the secret of secrets, the stranger who calls by night, the hidden master baiting you onto greater glory. I am the sun, the moon, the sky, the day, the night and everything in between. I am...

Quintessence! The 'fifth' element. Supreme being. I protect you, you bad human being.


-crotch crickets-
*scratch scratch* Dam to the feck that itches to the b!

So you're here to protect me Queen.. Queer.. Quintysomething. . Do you have a shorter name? One more pronounciable?

Leeloo Minai Lekarariba-Lamin ai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat. But you can call me Quess! ZMONG!

I see. So.. So what exactly are you, Mr. Q?

Well, think of me.. Think of me as a real-life honest to goo'ness kiddie-lovin' chocolatier, Michael Jackson! w00t.

Don't you mean Willy Wonka?

Oh yes of course! Silly me LOL! I was being distracted by the thought of dispensing my delicious fudge from the rear of my chocolate factory, like my new pen pal Gay Glitter tells me he does with Chinese takeaways.

Are you.. Are you some kind of paedophile?
You big silly! I LOVE urine. LOL! Anyway, as we say in the delicate land of chocolate, my native Switzerland; "Essen mein schizer das kindertots! "

And as you mentioned, I am like Mr. Lil Willy Wanking, I wish to hide my little 'surprise' for all the kiddies in chocolate and give them all the magical Golden Shower! Hooray!

I'm gonna pretend I don't understand what you've just said..
..and then while I still have a few years before I hit 30 and am forced to stop showing unhealthy interests in minors, I'll show them pictures of puppies, win their confidence, groom them with my cool w00tish l33tspeak, play videogames with them, I invite them into my cribs de gnomz, and then I can tell them the magic secret of secret sentences!

I'll say to them 'See children? Everything in this room is edible. Even my 'special part' is edible! Like Earl Grey and Galileo. That my children. is called phillatelistism; and that is frowned upon in most societies. But not by me! LOL!

I'll tell them to get on their knees and go to the little girls "Zmong my holographic unit, for you're all little b to the itches, especially you Jess!" ROFL. Girls. Females. Child-bearing walking uterii. That sound Sideshow Bob makes when stepping on a rake? How I hate them all for leaving me a broken decayed husk of a man. They make me sick. Yuk!

But boys! All those lovely, lovely boys. Ratings rating ratings! How I long to explore their chocolate factories, especially from behind. Del to the icious! Big w00t for them all! I..

Look Q, all this innuendo chat and all is fine and good and I know you can go on and on forever and not SHUT THE CUNT UP, but where exactly is Clara? What have you done to her? I DEMAND TO SEE HER!

Into the load of toilet you go. then you shall see. You know WHO you are. Later!

Clara! Clara? Where.. Where is she?

Clara? C.. Clara?
NOOOOOO!!!
That was a lucky break! While grouchyF*ck'dwhi netropic's distracted, I'll have to resort to plan B to complete my quest, my destiny to make him fall in love with me! Oooohhh someday F*ck'dman, I shall have your throbbingly massive elephant cock inside my self-inflicted vagina wound!

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commentaires
NoteNote :   
I love
8. 14.08.06 à 18:15 |Peshak10/10
Peshak
it is....
7. 18.05.06 à 21:45 |insertnamehere2/10
insertnamehere
Or is it?
6. 18.05.06 à 04:10 |FFXking10/10
FFXking
this is getting old...
5. 17.05.06 à 21:32 |insertnamehere2/10
insertnamehere
The Swiss speak German?
4. 14.05.06 à 01:29 |Entropic_Catalyst10/10
Entropic_Catalyst
Kwl!!!!
3. 13.05.06 à 11:18 |Mr_Washington10/10
Mr_Washington
kwl
2. 13.05.06 à 05:47 |grouchobeer10/10
grouchobeer
fifth element was a cool movie
1. 13.05.06 à 03:24 |I_Z_Z_Y10/10
I_Z_Z_Y
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