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"Tax My Chimp Up" starring Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law

par Entropic_Catalyst

120 pts / 12 votes - 11 commentaires


	Peanut, what's this television doing in my office?


	Transmitting visual images remotely.


	I mean why did you bring it in here? I've got important lawyer-type stuff to do.


	It's not every day one of your co-workers is on TV debating the hottest political issue du jour, mon ami.


	Oh, right. Potamus is supposed to be on that stupid talk show hosted by Fidel Castro.


	Mmm hmm, and the whole firm's watching it.


	Then I suppose I have to, too?


	Aw, c'mon, Harvey! This is no small matter. If this law is passed, it'll affect everyone, maybe even the Peanut himself.


	The Senate Judiciary Committee Wednesday morning approved a bill authorizing the establishment of an office in the IRS criminal investigation unit to prosecute superpowered vigilantes for violations of tax laws. Appearing with me tonight to discuss this issue are District Attorney Spyro, defense attorney Peter Potamus, superhero Black Vulcan, and former superhero companion Blip.


	Spyro, you're hoping to stamp out the superhero trade by taxing heroes and animal sidekicks, then jailing them when they don't pay?


	This law would use the federal tax code to shut down rogue superpowered mercenaries who are hard to get by way of other federal criminal laws and are not targeted by state law enforcement.


	How can this guy expect someone with a secret identity to file taxes on an activity that's technically illegal in the first place? They'd be paying the cops to show up and arrest them. No superhero is that stupid, except maybe Aquaman.


	Well it worked against Al Capone. The only charge they ever got him on was tax evasion.


	I would just like to interrupt this comic to emphatically state that the Mafia does not exist, and if they did, I would certainly never mock them. Thank you.


	Don't overlook the other underlying issues connected with this. The majority of the victims of involuntary sidekicking, those who are often smuggled in from other counties and virtually imprisoned in a Hall of Justice or Phantom Cruiser, are apes.


	Sure, forced labor and kidnapping should be opposed, but this legislation broadly targets the crime-fighting trade in general, and could target all the world's defenders, right down to your friendly neighborhood Spider-man. Those of us who work in this field understand that this does nothing to improve conditions in our industry.


	It's a no-brainer to have the IRS go after spandex-clad vigilantes. Prosecuting tax code violations can get these people off the street and yank from their grasp the monkeys and gorillas they exploit. This crime is right under our noses, and it's especially horrible when talking animals are being held prisoner. The thugs who run the superhero rings are exploiting society's poorest anthropomorphic simians for personal gain.


	Just because an animal works with superheroes, it don't mean they were forced to. Some of 'em like it. My friend Harvey used to be a superhero, and he treats his eagle real good.


	Spyro, how do we know you aren't just pushing for this law because you used to be a supervillian, huh? Maybe this is just another one of your diabolical schemes.


	Oh, you did not just go there, you pointy-eared freak!


	They're hitting each other with chairs!


	Every episode of The Fidel Show ends like that. Erika Eleniak almost killed Ted Kennedy last week.


	Potamus didn't have to go dragging up my name on the show like that.


	The hippo's got a point, though. I hope you've been filing W-2 forms for Avenger, or you're going to be having muchos problemas, mein freund.


	Oh, don't worry, a law like that one could never be passed.


	Birdman! That new tax law just passed! The Superfriends are being taken to court!


	I'll take the case!

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	"Tasty AND nutritious" - Marie, The French Connection.
	11. 05.06.08 à 00:43 \|Marie_Potter


	"THAT's a tasty comic" - Jules Weinfeld, Los Angeles "I will love it for ever and always" - Sandra Bullock, Somewhere
	10. 02.08.06 à 23:03 \|Bitch_Ass_Niggaz_In_The_Industry


	good
	9. 19.07.06 à 21:23 \|josh1


	5 for the avatars 5 for the length 0 for the title
	8. 05.07.06 à 21:26 \|Will.I.AM


	Superlaw! Love the avatars, especially the monkey. Heehee. Monkey.
	7. 03.07.06 à 19:13 \|thecaptainofo


	Its back w00t!!!!
	6. 03.07.06 à 17:24 \|CheGuevara


	cool
	5. 03.07.06 à 14:43 \|harlee


	Nice. never expected the comic to be this good.
	4. 02.07.06 à 02:48 \|pulse


	Chimp My Ride.
	3. 02.07.06 à 00:26 \|grouchobeer


	Ha!
	2. 01.07.06 à 21:39 \|modedude


	This is based on a real law that's being proposed: http://www.cnn.co... (Well, other than the superheroes and talking animals, and Fidel Castro having his own talk show, it's all real.) Special thanks to pulse for researching this news item. Stay tuned tomorrow or the next day for more monkey business when the world's greatest superheroes (and Birdman) go to trial.
	1. 01.07.06 à 21:21 \|Entropic_Catalyst

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