Taking Over Costco Pt. 2

Gina Gable had found the perfect tent that she could use to shade the party should it rain or snow unexpectedly. It was white, and according to the box, flew white streamers from every available place. She walked around clutching it for a moment to ask a sales representative how large of a scale it was, for she did have a large garden, and of course her whole neighborhood did come every year, with the exception of Florence Fenton because of the year that her children had attempted to spike the punch, an unfortunate occurrence really, when she saw the fortress that Mr. Barnstable had built. Looking out through a window at her, he waved, and as she waved back, her course of action was set. She trotted as fast as her stilettos would allow her to the party planning area, and pulled the tent out of the box. It was glorious, simply a marvel. She called Greta and Georgey over, along with the strollers that they had been using to zoom around, and set to work putting up the piece de résistance of her anniversary party.

Kati by this time was getting a little frantic. Wiggles had transferred over to Klaus, who was carrying him with a certain sense of anxiety about his bladder movements. The puppy, however, was most avidly earning his given name. Still pulling Klaus around, Kati was nearly run over by Georgey, while Klaus had to do a little maneuvering to avoid Greta. Staring astonished as the children in their stroller chariots wheeled away, Kati would have missed Mr. Barnstable’s orange stronghold had Klaus not turned her in its direction. Gaping at it, Kati looked around her to wonder who else had noticed this thing, and saw the rising turret of Gina Gable’s white streaming tent. It made a very striking image as well; to set off its highlights, Gina Gable had placed fans around it to send her streamers fluttering in a most majestic way. At that point, Kati walked quickly over to the camping section, and before Klaus could raise an eyebrow, picked out a rather nice looking tent; the kind with three rooms in it and a little chimney offered in a mail in rebate. She pulled it out of the box, and looked at Klaus, giving him ample time to raise an eyebrow and look surprised, both of which he did. After he’d done those things, he shrugged and began to help her set it up in a rather nice area in the bakery section.

Ms. Trenton had set herself up an odd looking cage of sorts out of the oversized shopping carts in the produce section. Despite some opposition from a manager and two employees, she managed to bring her loot to her chosen area, and locked her “oppressors” in the employee lounge. As she stuck bruised fruit to the wheels of her carts to discourage the interrupters of her peace, she busied herself simultaneously with knocking peaches against her head to test the sound that made. After using the bicycle locks pillaged from the sports section to lock her front door, Ms. Trenton hopped into her spare shopping cart and using a long pole formerly used to reach higher placed products, punted her vehicle down various aisles in search of canvas and sound equipment.

Patricia Peterson was in a bit of a panic. She had reached the camping section, to realize that various other shoppers had reached the nicest tents before her. After wresting a cozy two room away from a woman in oversized spectacles, she found a bit of luck in that she was able to fix herself up a spot close to the ingenious customer who’d declared himself the count of the camping section (which did have a rather nice ring to it), though it was widely accepted that the shopper who’d built the lovely orange manse was the monarch. At this point, Patricia Peterson had given up upon Mark. He’d capriciously decided to situate himself in the section with the most mirrors; the better to view his own reflection, and the time that she had summoned a stroller and went to visit him had not gone well. He didn’t want to move in to her tent, or even near it, and never even complimented her upon her luck in finding the situation she had. Barely even glancing at her aside from trying to halfheartedly charm her into moving to be closer to him, he’d otherwise expressed no interest in their relationship any longer, and thus she planned on setting her sights upon the count, who appeared to be very eligible indeed.

As Mr. Barnstable peered up over the top of the walls he had built, he was greeted by an interesting sight. Highways had been set up in the aisles, and strollers transported shoppers visiting relatives or friends around. The camping section had become a metropolis, where people did business with coupons, and watched the stock market on calculators from the special limited-time-only back to school section. Surrounding areas had developed suburban roots, ranging from the house that Kati and Klaus had set up in the bakery, to the McMansion that Gina Gable had created with her enormous white tent, to the contraption that Ms. Trenton had set up far away from civilization; covered in fruit and vegetables.

The employees stood no chance. The gum-chewing girl in the customer service desk was left cowering under a box, four employees and three managers were locked in the stockroom, and the cashiers at the registers had been shut in various bathrooms. Everyone else had fled, and the shoppers didn’t care enough to try and find them. They were much too busy.

Gina Gable continued planning for her anniversary party. Now that she was in such an advantageous location, she used it to her immense benefit; strolling her lands frequently in order to peruse the options that she had in planning her soiree. Staying with her previous plan of an Antarctic theme, she often visited her neighbors in the clothing section, much to their vast annoyance, as she insisted upon trying everything on, and the fitting rooms were at the time being used for town hall meetings. She had entertained some hope of getting to know her neighbors Kati and Klaus better, however decided against it because she disliked Wiggles and felt that their wedding was in danger of overshadowing her own party.

Kati had convinced Klaus that they should get married in their tent, as it smelled quite pleasant in the bakery section, and they could get a nice wedding cake quickly. They set a date for later in the next week, and Kati occupied herself with using mobile phones to phone neighbors and visiting the party planning section for ideas, though after a few hours she stopped calling upon Gina Gable when she dropped by. Klaus used this time to try and get the mail in rebate to surprise Kati with the nice chimney that had been advertised on the box. He also took long walks with Wiggles, who seemed to be enjoying himself without the presence of any other animals, and felt terribly happy to be in charge of such a large domain.

Ms. Trenton by this time was left to her own devices, except for the occasional curious neighbor who wondered what that queer sound was. Once they had discovered she was throwing fruit against the walls, and sometimes against people, they usually left, although her art was widely agreed to be rather amazing and introspective. She enjoyed a lucrative reputation with this, drawing in many people to see her art, and then happily pelting them with fruit and recording the various sounds. For instance, one day she hit a rather large man with an artichoke, the video of which became an instant sensation, despite the lawsuit he attempted to file against her for wrongful pelting of fruit.

Patricia Peterson was now seeing the count of the camping section with some success, and dreamt of one day becoming the countess, though she was a little dubious of his lackluster campaigning policy. She and Mark didn’t keep in touch; the last she’d heard of him he had been going out with the gum chewing girl from customer service. She didn’t doubt that she wasn’t going out with him merely to try and blend in with the locals, and found it disgraceful, but thought it rather crude to spread rumors. As it happened, she was right. Mark had found himself someone to continuously laugh at his terrible jokes, and to let him do whatever he wanted, including playing video games and admiring himself in the mirror; sometimes both at once.

Barney Barnstable, having been cordially invited to attend the wedding of Kati Kaminski and Klaus Kristin, planned to be present. He was outfitted in a lovely polo the shade of his house, with pleather shoes to match, and he found himself mildly excited that he should be going out to mingle with people he didn’t know. Strolling along the boulevard by the house and home section, watching people doing laundry in the fountains and quietly sitting on the porches of houses formerly known as garden sheds, he felt rather peaceful indeed. Walking past the employee stockroom, where peeved faces peered out of the window at him, he even tossed a cereal box coupon their way, neglecting to remember that cereal box coupons were rather light and as such didn’t quite follow the pattern at which one tossed them. (The coupon in question actually ended up in the soup of a businessman just sitting down to lunch. Being that he wasn’t very fond of artichoke soup, he used the coupon to get some cereal instead, and because of his good mood, made three very important business deals in one afternoon.)

~ To be continued.